Dear Fragment of my past,
There is something i want to confess. i always said that i throw you from the moon door and expect you to never come back, the truth is i never did throw you. you are always there. Right from 2012 July when we first met as a friend, from 2013 May as my first crush, from 2014 June as my first love, from 2015 June as a broken love, from 2016 Jan as “you don’t exist in my life” lie and from 2018 June as a fragment of my past.
I constantly kept you in my memories. I always felt that one day you will love me back just the way i did. From the so many people around you, you will understand my love for you. I never stopped loving you. even if i said i did. I said it was a fluctuation, i said i was young and stupid. The truth is i never stopped loving you, and the biggest curse is that i still love you. and i don’t think i am ever going to stop loving you.
But… yes there is a but here. This is the final letter to you from me. Because today i will push you from the moon door honestly. I am done cheating on myself. I cant make my heart and mind a fool anymore.
I met a guy. He made me realize my worth. That i am so special and awesome. That any guy will be so happy to have a person like me.He could just go on talking about me. And after talking to him,for the first time in my life, i could answer the question i always asked myself, ” If i really am all that, then why cannot you see it, why cant you love me the way i do.” Now i know. Its not me who has a problem. Its you. You never did realize my worth. Just the way he understood my worth and that i deserve good, you never did.And finally i understood my worth…. I understood it was never me. It was always you. You never understood me. You never realized my worth. I know i am not beautiful, i may not be the prettiest one around. I may not be as thin as other girls and have those beautiful eyes and hair to make you fall in love with me. But i always had a heart which loved you for more than 6 years no matter what. But now its time,Its time that i end my suffering.
I love you and always will. But that time has passed. Now that i know you don’t deserve a person like me who loved you with all her heart and waited for the day when you will finally see my heart and not what i want you to see. I waited for you from 2013 to 2019. For more than 6 years. Its time now. I stop the waiting.
You would not know because my love for you was always one sided. You would not know how i longed for you. you would not know how you helped me change my life for good. I hope you never go through what i went through. I hope you find your love and live happily ever after.
Bye Idiot !! Its finally time.
Someone who has finally ceased to exist in your life